It’s 2018 and I am still getting to grips with my conditions while working on my goals and business.
I try not to focus on the negativity and obstacles of being a wife, a mother of 4 or being away from my family while living with chronic conditions.
Why? Because I realise very few people actually care. This is just a fact! Everyone has something in their life they are dealing with or feel is of utmost importance to them rather than listening to a 40 year old complain about her daily struggles with her health.
Now in my few years of living with my conditions, I discovered that fellow sufferers empathise, some of my close friends and family help in some way or another and I have met kinder, more caring individuals on social media than those I know personally. My family and friends know most of the symptoms of conditions I struggle with and I do my best to break it down to a level where they can grasp how overwhelming it can be when all my conditions flare up at once.
The level of pain and fatigue I experience on any given day cannot be put into words really, as they change constantly. No two days are the same.
In the last 6 months I have gone from feeling hopeful to despair and then back to the process of healing and accepting the curveball life has thrown at me.
I had made significant progress managing my pain and health in 2017 and I was on track with my health and business. In September I started to feel darkness creep up on me, the one that comes with living with chronic pain, fatigue amongst other issues but there have been valid reasons for it so I have not put it down to just being a part of the condition I have.
Days go by where my sleep is interrupted or I don’t sleep at all due to throbbing pain in my limbs, headaches, fever and the inability to turn without wanting to scream in agony. Most mornings I struggle to get up, I have very little appetite and I experience low mood and anxiety but not every day.
Some mornings, like to today, I wake up feeling rested, focused, determined and hopeful for a full day of normality. These are the days I make count. These days of clarity are the days when all my dreams and aspirations are clear in my mind.
On a day like today I know have got to let go of the stress and the outside influences which cause the physiological symptoms of my conditions to manifest and intensify. The hardest part is stay focused on practising the good habits I was taught and being consistent with them. This is where family support and support of good friends come in. It so easy to sink into a dark hole of despair when you see things falling apart around you.
What I would like to share with others suffering with chronic illnesses is this:
- Don’t give up on your dreams, find a way to work around your illness.
- Create little to-do-lists or a daily planner and be realistic about what you can do and when you don’t manage to complete a task; forgive yourself and move on.
- Stop apologising to others or explaining yourself over and over again. Those who care understand and won’t judge you.
- Find an activity that you can do at least once a week to ease your discomfort and one that will help improve your health.
- Be kind to yourself .
- Be proud of all you manage to achieve, no matter how small it may seem. Every little task you complete is a something to be proud of because you know the amount of effort it takes to complete it.
It isn’t easy to keep getting up everyday and fighting the invisible battle but it isn’t impossible…you will only know this if you keep trying.
As hard as it is, remember you are not alone, there are very good support groups available out there and there are ways you can overcome some of the hurdles you face daily.
I have listed a few apps and groups I joined below.
Wishing you a wonderful weekend.